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Birth Family Background Information (Part 2)

August 30, 2006

CIRCUMSTANCES OF PLACEMENT AND/OR OTHER SIGNIFICANT INFORMATION

The birth mother first contacted Los Angeles County department of adoptions by telephone to set up an appointment to set up adoptive planning for the baby she was expecting in three months. She was 16 years old, very bright with an IQ of 118 and very attractive. “She has lovely features. She has large hazel eyes, a very clear complected skin and light brown hair that she wears very short and simply. She is also tall and has a slim, shapely figure.”

At the time of the initial interview, the birth mother was caring for her 13 year old brother and her 9 year old brother who was neurologically handicapped as well as two neighborhood children who were 3 or 4 years old and from her mother’s day care home. Her mother (maternal grandmother) was out of town and had left her with the responsibility for her brother and the day care children. It was difficult for the birth mother to focus on adoptive planning when the children were running in and out during the interview.

The birth mother felt that she was too young to take care of a baby at this time in her life. She did not marry and said she could not visualize being the mother of a child and providing proper care. Even though her mother did not directly discuss her pregnancy, the birth mother felt she was aware of her situation but did not want to influence her decision. She began to cry because her mother was failing to provide her with any direction by her avoidance of a frank and direct discussion. The atmosphere in the home was stressful.

The adoption worker explained the services available. And the process involved in adoptive planning.

In terms of background, the birth mother never knew her own father. She was told that he died when he was in the service in Korea while her mother was pregnant with her. Her mother had at least three marriages and four children from four different men. her mother relied on her quite a bit and she assisted her mother with the child care and baby-sitting at the daycare her mother ran.

The birth mother stated that her long-time boyfriend, age 17, was the birth father of the child she was expecting. He was the son of a doctor and his ethnicity was Irish and Scottish. She described him as agnostic. He was aware of his girlfriend’s pregnancy but did not want his parents to learn of his condition. He and the birth mother appeared to have a good relationship and confided in one another easily. They had known each other for the last two years and dated for the last year. He admitted to using drugs such as marijuana and LSD and felt that it was preferable to alcohol. He did seem concerned about the birth mother and the baby but stated neither one of them had considered marriage even though they cared about one another. He felt they were really too young to become parents and he supported the adoption plan.

The birth mother wanted to enter a maternity home and was admitted to Booth Memorial Maternity Home. There was a new adoption worker for the birth mother after her admission and in late august 1968, she interviewed the birth mother at the maternity home. She described her as “…a lovely looking girl with large hazel eyes, long straight blonde hair which is slightly tinted, a heart-shaped face, and a good complexion.” She thought the birth mother was extremely intelligent interesting and articulate who enjoyed analyzing people and situations.

The birth mother enjoyed talking to the birth father and her mother but she did not have many girlfriends. She thought of herself as a loner who enjoyed reading and who hoped to be a social worker or a teacher. She was close to one of her teacher and would visit her teacher and his wife. The birth mother smoked marijuana regularly, particularly if she were nervous. She had been on probation for smoking marijuana.

After your birth, you were given a name and your birth mother visited you in the nursery and had a chance to hold you. You were a very cute baby with sparse blonde hair flat ears and had no medical problems. She signed the under care papers which allowed the adoption agency to place you temporarily in foster care and indicated that she would call to arrange signing the relinquishment in a few weeks.

Three weeks later, the birth mother met with the adoption worker to discuss keeping you. She explained that her birth mother planned to marry again, was cutting down on her day care responsibilities and wanted her daughter to keep the baby so that the maternal grandmother could raise him and give her new husband the experience of parenting a baby. The birth mother was not strong enough to pursue adoptive planning when her mother opposed it even when she felt it unhealthy for herself and her baby. She had broken off with the birth father, had a new boyfriend and had changed schools.

The maternal grandmother contacted the adoption worker and indicated that she wanted her daughter to complete her education so she would be willing to take care of the baby for the next two or three years. She also planned on marrying in the next few months and would let people outside of the family believe that the baby was either adopted she and her husband had produced.

You were returned to the home of your birth mother on 10/31/68. She had come to the agency with her mother and prospective step-father and did not appear happy with the plan.

to be continued…

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  1. Oooh, the thot plickens. So you lived with your birth mother for a time…!


  2. Scott! This is so interesting and exciting! It must be strange to read about the beginnings of YOUR life like this! I was surprised by the details of her physical descriptions. Did they give her an I.Q. test??


  3. I think I made some errors when typing this out. I’ll fix them later. The gist of it is that in the end maternal grandmother convinced (or coerced?) birth mother to take me back from the adoption agency, saying she’d take care of me herself.

    I asked that, too, about the IQ test! Was this standard procedure or what?


  4. This is such an interesting story! I can’t wait to hear the rest of it.


  5. Grrr! I’m gone 5 days and look what I’ve missed! How exciting!!! But I’m confused…..the first description says she has short, simply kept light brown hair, then later it says she has long, straight blonde hair. Hmmmm…..(leave it to me to catch that detail)


  6. […] Here is part 1 and part 2 if you missed them. […]



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