Any way but Sideways!

January 21, 2008

Way back when, in the earliest days of me and Karen, I invited her over to watch a movie at my place. She said yes, but then–panic!–what to watch? I eventually drove to Best Buy and bought two DVDs: Sideways and Chocolat. When Karen arrived, I popped in Chocolat. Boy did I make the right choice.

All this time later–what almost a year?–we finally just watched Sideways. It was well-written and well-acted. I just hated both of the main characters. Hated. I mean, one guy is such a slave to his dick that he can’t stop himself from sleeping with two different women in the week before his marriage. The other guy needs to screw his own dick on a little tighter lest it fall off and desert him out of spite. Two years divorced (gee, I wonder why?) he is cajoled(!) into going out with a beautiful and intelligent woman…and he proceeds to uncomedically screw it up, start to finish.

At one frustrating juncture during his exasperating date, we paused the movie to refresh our drinks. I turned to Karen and said “well if he won’t kiss a beautiful woman, I will!” And I did.

Anyway, back to the hate. I hated this movie simply because its two main characters were such impossible dumbasses. Don’t bother. There’s no joy in it, only pathetic losers too painful to watch for more than ten minutes.


No comments yet

  1. It’s always refreshing to hear someone else who hated this movie. My wife and I watched it after hearing everyone we knew raving about it, and found our hate of the two characters tempered only by the fact that we didn’t care about them at all.

    What a miserable piece of phlegm.

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